Breadwinner
24 Reviews
Reviews
SCUM
Lots of violence and swearing so do NOT bring the kids - or if you do make sure you bring a tablet or device for them to play on
Road 2 Revenge
Looks like Herm’s Heroes were able to secure a big marquee name for this film — the Labour candidate for Ilam. I’m a sensible Kiwi who wants to a) get NZ back on track b) get a “back pocket boost” of $20 a week sorry I mean a fortnight and c) make available a “digital nomad visa” to encourage innovation and grow the pie, so far that reason I will be voting for another film. Didn’t understand the plot of this but I am 40+.
The True Story of Billy the Horse
Multilayered epic that’s two buddy movies in one — a buddy movie about two buddies joining forces to disguise themselves as someone else’s buddy in an entirely separate buddy movie. The best horse oriented movie I’ve seen since I watched A View to a Kill on Amazon Prime last month so that’s pretty cool. Impressive miniature effects which I am convinced could not be created in 48 hours — am reporting this cheeky and sneaky behaviour to the judges to get this film disqualified from contention.
Stuck in Invercargill
My eyes were… “glued” to the screen during this buddy romp. Haha just kidding I lost a bit of interest towards the end but the punchline brought the house down. Genuinely nice buddy chemistry that made me wish I had a friend myself! But unfortunately here I am reviewing 48 Hours heat films on a Friday night while sitting on the toilet.
EOD
Rolling laughing for the first 20 minutes at the slurping sounds and the wipwipwipwipwip sounds, then got a bit exhausted when it just kept going slurrrrp and wipwipwip for an additional 30 or 40 minutes. The guy transforming into his “lady with big hooters” form got me sitting up in my seat and paying close attention…
Whoopies Daisy
Good comic conceit, bad settling on a title. Who will survive? Buy a ticket to “Whoopies Daisy” or “Oopsie Daisy” or whatever the hell this is called and find out.
love you, baby
A documentary about the last phone call I had with my annoying wife. Impressive choreography and photography. If you have kids who are scared of ladies coming down stairs do NOT bring them to any screenings of this spookablast
MILK!
Great to see people who get rock hard over the idea of drinking icy cold milk get some representation onscreen at last. Loved the dream sequence and the frankly appalling SFX of the tiny guy running on the bench. This is the garbage we wanna see.
Spicing Things Up
A story of two elderly men taking lots of shits. Enormous missed opportunity IMHO not adding in loud wet hot farting sounds every time they went to the toilet but the person next to me was in stitches so maybe it wasn’t necessary.
Never Ever say Never Ever Ever Again
Much-needed showcase for elderly actors doing action roles a la Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny. This is a Bond parody that kicks off with an inspired replica of the iconic GoldenEye teaser and also includes sped-up footage of hands shuffling cards that tickled my funny bone. Better than Quantum of Solace both technically and creatively and it was only made in 48 hours I understand.
Come Die with Me
This delectable confection did NOT tickle and tantalise my tastebuds. Hardly a feast but a passable snack. Ghost effects had me spooked - you ever seen thru someone in a kitchen? Well I have and this movie which I understand is called Come Die With Me captures it well and folks it’s no picnic.
Cover Your Ears
Nice movie with good comic timing. Loved the guy they dug up to play the cult leader or whatever he is. The best kind of 48 Hours actor, like someone’s Dad who’s happy to pitch in, every slightly “off” line reading had me giggling and made me genuinely happy, made my heart genuinely warm. Loved your work buddy. Get him on Go Girls or Orange Roughies if either of those are still on TV?
The Odyssey
I mean this sucked and it knows it sucks but it’s still better directed than anything Christopher Nolan has done? Has anyone seen that bit in Batman Begins where that guy in jail gets sprayed with a fear gas and starts yelling or that bit in The Dark Knight where Batman is riding a motorbike at the Joker and then yells “Raahh!” and turns his motorbike and crashes it? Absolutely awful direction and that asshole had more than 48 hours.
Smoke and Mirrors
A lovely family of songbirds with uniformly great chemistry and different levels of singing skills brings a much-needed “Les Mis” flavour to this otherwise very grim and serious tale of a family who stumble across a haunted mirror which spells trouble for them and in a BIG way. I think? Not sure what was going on. Not sure what’s more impressive — the winning verge-of-laughter performances or the loophole they found for getting around having to compose a bunch of music.
Asset Improvement
Render Rebels assembled a unique team of right wing Christchurch political figures to bring us this confusing saga of someone injecting himself with a magic potion and then there’s a dragon? Ok sure, whatever, I had Tears in my eyes laughing.
Back to the Drawing Board
WHAT IF… a cartoon came to life…? They can’t so who cares, but this is a very cute and high effort entry that filled the room with smiles and laughs just like in Batman when Jack Nicholson sprays that parade with smile potion
You broke my space laser!
Two genuinely great lines better than any dialogue in Die Another Day so that must be pretty cool for the Mad Scientists to hear if they ever read this. End credits song better than the Sam Smith song from Spectre. Ski chase significantly worse than the one in On Her Majesty’s Secret Service but ya can’t win em all and I understand the filmmakers only had 48 hours in which to make this?
Data Management and Security Training
Technical prowess but very unconvincing casting of two intermediate age youngsters as corporate high-flyers.
Pazu Who?
Demonic possession is no laughing matter and yet here we are. Questions of good taste and sound quality aside, this focuses on the lighter side of what can be a taboo subject. You can hear the lead actor’s fake teeth fall out of his mouth at one point - not impressed.
Magic in the Sack
A very sexually charged film focused on wizards buoyed - but the steamy atmosphere turns sour with a grim ending depicting the death of a young man on a public street. Where are the police?
No Time To Die... Again
Genuinely a delight to see this old lad back in action. Still more athletic and appropriate for this role than Roger Moore and if you think I’m kidding, just watch him trying to climb onto that bomb rig at the end of A View To A Kill. The combo here of Hanmer Springs tourist attractions and inoffensive drum n bass music gives this film the air of a “Visitor Television” promo airing on a loop on a hotel room TV. Loved it.
Hi Santa, it's Charlie
Basically a sitcom subplot edited together into a five minute sketch that lives or dies on its lead performance but thankfully that lead performance is good. Only suggestion is that the actor ditch the outrageous and frankly very disrespectful haircut - maybe the most disrespectful movie haircut since Tom Cruise in M:I-2. Great sound and lighting squandered by lack of ambition - come on folks, one entry this year had a SKI CHASE, and here you are turning in a grand total of three shots filmed in what can only be described as a squalid starter home.
Turpe
“Turpi” is about a priest shitting or cumming - it’s never made clear. It takes nerves of steel to submit this to a film competition so kudos in that department “Olax”. Absolutely unconcerned with being liked, laughed at or even understood, and yet somehow people seemed to. The lead actor gives a galvanising performance as a priest who either shits or cums and seems on the edge of genuine fury at having to do presumably 500 takes.
One Star
People at the screening were lapping up the cheeky and outrageous antics of the Uber Eats driver. However, the home audience were not impressed - “creepy”, “unpleasant” were some of the words bandied about. So viewer: beware of this controversial figure.